From Dr. Leslie Becker-Phelps Psychology Today blog, Making Change.
In contrast, kindness brings emotions in more closely. Acceptance calms them and dispenses with their need to defend against a critical adversary. Then, when a person experiences – in an accepting way – their painful emotion, they become more comfortable with it and less upset by it. It still hurts, but they are no longer also feeling distress about having the emotion.
Kindness, compassion … being generous to yourself. These are repeating themes: in Leslie’s posts, and in my visits to my therapist and yoga studio. And from my friend’s recommendation 5 years ago of Naomi Shihab Nye’s poem, Kindness, which Libby and I read at Jack’s memorial service.